A hug in a mug… a Christmas mug at that. Exactly what I needed after the past week and a half.
I’ve never tried making a mug cake before but last night as I decompressed “mi jos fiil fi somn swiit” (I just wanted something sweet) and nothing in my kitchen fit the bill. I did however spot a pack of Milo in the fridge so figured hey why not?
So what was it about this past week?
To be honest, in the grand scheme of my life this was definitely nowhere near the worst that I’ve been through it was just a lot I think, of both good and grueling.
Meetings, a speaking engagement, an out of town trip just to name a few on top of the usual ins and outs of regular life did have me feeling a bit overwhelmed quite a few times these past few days.
Being a full time stay at home mom (SAHM) for a decade now the whole concept of T.G.I.F. (Thank God it’s Friday) lost it’s lustre pretty quickly. Infants and toddlers have no regard for a weekend and once they begin school Saturday and Sunday soon became the most hectic days of the week. I have not genuinely celebrated T.G.I.F. in years but I must say today has brought that feeling. I feel like I’ve been holding my breath trying to bickle down and get through all my to dos and now I can breathe. In fact my Milo mug cake was the first deep breath.
“When doubts filled my mind, your comfort gave me renewed hope and cheer.” Psalm 94:19
This verse is one of my favourite in pretty much any version but I especially love the New Living Translation above. It spoke life to me this past week and reality of it truly kept me going. Can I tell you, my thoughts were all over the place. Imposter syndrome tried to rear it’s ugly head every chance it got, and there were many. Every single challenge with either one of the children reopened the flood gates of mom doubt. Every pain and heaviness of mood had me questioning all my life choices.
Was I doing enough?
Did I spend too much?
Was I supportive enough?
Did I affirm enough?
Did I discipline enough?
HAVE I BEEN DRINKING ENOUGH WATER!?!?
I had several opportunities to drive myself crazy HOWEVER I truly did draw comfort from knowing that God was with me and guiding all the steps even if I fumbled. I admit, this really could sound like expected Christian response but it is my genuine, lived experience this past week. The issues didn’t go away, things didn’t cost less and I still had aches and pains due to lupus flaring BUT God’s presence gave me peace and provided moments of hope and cheer.
Are you screaming TGIF today or barely hanging in there so you can crash in your bed later on?
Have a blessed day